Chuck Norris facts

[sabbattack]

to kserw oti einai persina ksuna stafulia, alla gamwto einai EPOS.

Parte ena deigma:

# When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

# Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

# There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.

# Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.

# Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

# Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

# Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

# Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

# There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.

# When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.

# Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.

# Chuck Norris’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.

# There is no such thing as global warming. Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up.

# Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.

# Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.

# Chuck Norris gave Mona Lisa that smile.

# Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

# Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost

# Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.

# Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.


O,ti prepei gia kalokairines mplouzes! \m/


http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/

[hunted by a Freak]

τεραστιο προβλημα.οχι μαλακιες

[House Of Low Culture]

*Chuck Norris doesn't believe in Germany.
*Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
*A study showed the leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart disease, 2. Chuck Norris, 3. Cancer
*Chuck Norris cannot love, he can only not kill.
*According to Einstein's theory of relativity, Chuck Norris can actually roundhouse kick you yesterday.
*Chuck Norris wears a live rattlesnake as a condom.
*Nagasaki never had a bomb dropped on it. Chuck Norris jumped out of a plane and punched the ground.
*Chuck Norris can judge a book by its cover.
*When Chuck Norris plays Monopoly, it affects the actual world economy.
*Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun.
*Chuck Norris knows the last digit of pi.
*Chuck Norris can get Blackjack with just one card.
*Chuck Norris can split the atom. With his bare hands.
*Chuck Norris can hold his breathe for nine years.
*Chuck Norris make onions CRY!!!
*Chuck Norris is not only a noun, but a verb
























































*Chuck Norris let the dogs out.

έχω λιώσει.

[necropethamenos]

ntaks, palia alla apistefta theika.

eidika ekeino me to mpampoula, ntaks, ti idea thee mou

Jesus walks on water. Chuck Norris walks on Jesus.

When Chuck Norris falls into a river, he doesn't get wet. The water gets Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris makes the onions cry.

Εντάξει ρισπέκτ. Έχω κάτσει και τα έχω δει όλα, πολλά είναι απίστευτα καμένες ατάκες.

[Candiru]

JWhen Chuck Norris falls into a river, he doesn't get wet. The water gets Chuck Norris.
.

ζωντανό νερό με μνήμη

Πούστη Καντιρού, βρώμισες τα chuck norris facts με τις εναλλαγές σου.

[cavity]

τέλειο θρεντ.

[psychomaverick]

*Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
*Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.
*When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet. Water gets Chuck Norris.
*Chuck Norris CAN believe it's not butter.
*The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
*Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

[stam and the witches]

*Chuck Norris can judge a book by its cover.

I think I blew a funny fuse

[metamelia2]

*Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.

[DarkOmeN]

E
Π
Ο
Σ

[sabbattack]

fxarstw gia thn agaph sas!

[wraithmare]

-If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever.

-Chuck Norris originally appeared in the "Street Fighter II" video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this "glitch," Norris replied, "That's no glitch."

-The opening scene of the movie "Saving Private Ryan" is loosely based on games of dodgeball Chuck Norris played in second grade.
-Chuck Norris once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!"

-Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.

-Chuck Norris can hit you so hard that he can actually alter your DNA. Decades from now your descendants will occasionally clutch their heads and yell "What The Hell was That?"

-The Chuck Norris military unit was not used in the game Civilization 4, because a single Chuck Norris could defeat the entire combined nations of the world in one turn.

-When Chuck Norris goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.

-There are no races, only countries of people Chuck Norris has beaten to different shades of black and blue.

-Scientists have estimated that the energy given off during the Big Bang is roughly equal to 1CNRhK (Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick)

-When Chuck Norris has sex with a man, it won't be because he is gay. It will be because he has run out of women.

-Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

-Chuck Norris doesnt shave; he kicks himself in the face. The only thing that can cut Chuck Norris is Chuck Norris.

-Chuck Norris invented black. In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink.

-Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoloy card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.

-On his birthday, Chuck Norris randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun.

-In the beginning there was nothing...then Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked that nothing in the face and said "Get a job". That is the story of the universe.

-Chuck Norris once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink.

-Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.

-Simply by pulling on both ends, Chuck Norris can stretch diamonds back into coal.

-Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks don't really kill people. They wipe out their entire existence from the space-time continuum.

[Solo Carriera]

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

ευτυχία.